47th: Stayed the same, but with a difference

I was the same as last week when I weighed in yesterday. Was I crushed? No. I resolve to do better. Sometimes a gain or remaining the same is a mystery. Other times we know the cause.

So what made the difference? Last night was an event called Celebrate Success, held at a hall not far from me. Florine Mark was the speaker. Anyone who had lost 50 or more pounds through WW could register to attend and be recognized. All WW members could register and go and many were there to cheer us on.

I almost did not go. First off, when my leader Suzanne mentioned this months ago, I told her that my daughter-in-law's due date is the 29th (yesterday was the 27th) and that I would be on call to stay with our 5 year old grandson. Suzanne encouraged me to register and would pick up my award if I couldn't make it. What I didn't tell her is that I almost didn't go because I thought I did not like Florine.

Why did I think that? I don't know, I guess something in a commercial or an interview bugged me a long time ago and stayed with me even though I can't recall it now. I kept thinking of reasons not to go but Suzanne, without knowing this, kept encouraging me anyway. So did my husband. And my yet-to-be-born granddaughter apparently wanted me to go too.

Guess what?  I really enjoyed hearing Florine speak. She was good. She made her points in a timely fashion, hit the right notes by including some personal revelations and being very approachable.

Many people, WW or not, will sneer at Florine or Oprah (when she was losing weight and talking about it routinely on her show) or anyone else who appears to be successful and wealthy. "Oh sure, I could lose weight too if someone made the meals for me and put the plate in front of me" is something I've heard. While I admit that I wouldn't turn down the experience of having someone do the shopping, prepping and cooking for me, that has nothing to do with whether you are successful at weight loss!

I seriously doubt Florine, Oprah or anyone else who has been mocked for having a chef while losing weight has that person glued to their side, swatting potato chips, cookies, alcohol....whatever...out of their hands between meals.

Florine has been widowed twice. Once at the age of 34 when her husband died of cancer and her second husband died after being diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease. Financial success didn't prevent these tragic events. She learned that going to bed with ice cream didn't help either.

Bingo!

There's the common denominator of all who have battled weight issues. Who hasn't cried over someone or something and tried to comfort themselves with food? We all know that doesn't work but we have done it anyway.

Florine lost 50 pounds nine times before losing it with WW and keeping it off for 35 years. I have lost a lot of weight twice before this. I'm old enough and now wise enough to not say that I will never have missteps again, but I also know that ice cream doesn't cure anything and that only I can do what I need to do. Supportive family is wonderful and I am blessed to have that, but what goes in my mouth is up to me.

Most of us know the truth but we hide from it, at least at times. We either look for an easy answer or make excuses. We pigeonhole ourselves and get stuck being overweight, not creative, afraid....fill in your own blank with what you stop yourself from being.

Florine says she tells herself every morning that today is going to be a good day. I think that, but maybe I need to say it out loud for emphasis. It can't hurt, right? I'm having Aha! moments left and right these days and see that they are related. On my other blog is a story about visiting the art institute and what that did for me. Read that here.

Ninety people were recognized for their weight loss last night. I think the total amount lost was 6722 pounds. I know the person sitting next to me and I have both lost more since we registered so the total was probably greater than that number. That is a lot of weight!!

Onward, downward, inspired and strong!

46th Weigh In

Wow, six weeks away from a year since this all began. The time has flown. And to think of all the previous years when the time flew but I didn't put any effort into WW....oh well, I just wasn't ready.

Two revealing stories today. First, my husband asked me to stop and get him donuts after my meeting this morning. Donuts aren't a particular weakness of mine so I didn't mind doing this. I came home with a half dozen and learned (after all these years) that he doesn't like chocolate batter donuts. I ate one because A) I was hungry and B) I have 6.5 days before I weigh in again. Of course that is ridiculous rationale but I bet many people have done this. The question that I am now asking myself, hours later, is why did I do this? It isn't WW guilt, it is that donuts sit like lead in me. Always have, and apparently always will. The lead is either heavier because I've gotten older or is more pronounced after losing weight. Lesson learned: Leave the dang things alone!

The other story is about knitting and fitting. I've done ok with shopping for clothes while losing weight. I wish I could say one size fits no matter where I shop but that isn't the case. Even within a brand, I sometimes have to try on two sizes to find which one fits better, and then there are overlapping numbers in both women's and misses sizes with the women's size being cut a little fuller. Two new pair of slacks are straight misses sizes, two pair of shorts from another store are women's. I'm not wearing them inside out with the size tag showing, so who cares?

My point is that I've done ok with figuring out what size to try on in stores so how did I goof so terribly in knitting? For years I rarely made myself clothing because of my weight. Things weren't flattering or patterns weren't offered in my size. I never wanted anything tight that would emphasize a bulge or ride across the fullest part of my butt. I knitted a casual top in a Tee shirt sort of shape. The full story is here.  My enormous mistake was in making it in a size I would have chosen a year ago, something that even then might have been a little big to avoid hugging bulges.

I knew I wasn't going to take it all apart and re-knit the top, so I sewed new seams on the sewing machine and cut off the excess in the amount of 8" total.

Both of these stories are examples of What the heck was I thinking? I wasn't. In both cases, I should have known better but I am human.

No more donuts (urp! ... 'scuse me) and no more starting a knitting project with measuring myself first!

Down another .8 pounds today for a total of 64.5.
Onward and downward!

# 45 Slow and steady

A friend is concerned about a family member's slow weight loss. That person has quite a bit to lose and my friend thinks it should be coming off more quickly, especially in the early weeks of being on program. The person on WW is concerned with point values of foods in restaurants to the point that I think they are avoiding eating out. I'm not sure if they have the Weight Watcher Eating Out book (which I find helpful),  use eTools or use any of the other sites that can be helpful in determining points or making suggestions of what to choose when eating away from home.

There are often times when I am not in control of how food is prepared and don't feel comfortable asking. I think if you are paying for a meal in a restaurant it is easier to ask these things before ordering, but when a guest in someone's home, unless a food allergy is involved, I prefer to make the best choices I can based on what I know. Sometimes this is just a guestimate, but I figure if I am trying to make the best choice and counting something it is better than throwing caution to the wind. Gone are the days of thinking "screw it...I've already blown it with the appetizer, I may as well lick my plate clean and have two desserts".

I don't know if it is my age kicking in, the point I'm at in my WW journey, the side of my brain that rules common sense finally getting through to the pleasure only side, or a combination of everything but I am listening to my body now in ways that I didn't before. If I have eaten a good breakfast and lunch and think I am hungry around 3:00, the first thing I try is more water. Often what our body is saying is "I'm thirsty" but out of habit, we give it a candy bar.  {Not me personally....and if you're the clerk at 7-11 that would swear otherwise...I'm not that person anymore...honest!!} If I still think or definitely know I am hungry, I have fruit or a piece of WW string cheese and perhaps think of moving dinner time up a little sooner. The funny thing is that I don't think I have felt hungry once in the evening since starting WW. We usually have dinner between 6:00 and 6:30 and often I am awake until midnight or 1:00. I drink water, decaf coffee or occasionally diet Coke in the evening but rarely eat after dinner. Even if I have dessert, it is shortly after if not immediately following dinner.

My point is that not only do two people not lose the same way, at different points in our lives, individuals will lose differently. Part of that is our metabolism and how it changes. One time in my 30's on WW, I lost 11 pounds the first week on plan. Wouldn't that be something if that was the norm?!! Unfortunately for me, that was when my goal was still a number on the scale or a dress size. That focus didn't work for me. Once I reached the number, I got sloppy with what went into my mouth. One night of excess wasn't going to hurt. It wouldn't have, but one night became three, then ten and old habits crept back but if you've struggled with weight, you know that story.

I am ok with being 62.5 and having a slower metabolism than when I was 30. For one thing, it beats being dead and having no metabolism at all. I'm a bit smarter about worldly things and a whole smarter about myself at this age than 30 years ago. If your weight is headed in the right direction, you are doing fine even with occasionally hiccups at the scale. It would be easy to think "if I had lost 2 pounds per week, I'd be down 90 pounds now" but why not carry that further and think that if I had lost a "mere" three pounds a week, I'd been down 135 or 4 pounds would put me .....dead!   Yes, I'm getting a little silly, but judging yourself by the speed of reduction is silly too. Do better with what you can, food choices and exercise, and your body will respond.

The best thing for me to remember is that if I had nothing different from what I was doing last year at this time, I would be 63.7 pounds heavier than I am today. I wouldn't be playing tag with my grandson and would still be on blood pressure medication. This success so far is immeasurable.

Onward and downward!

#44: Sweets, Shoes and Shucks

Yesterday was Easter. We have candy in the house and I am the one who bought it. I won't say I haven't had any of it, but I am in control, not it!!  That doesn't work for everyone, nor has it always worked for me, but for now, I am good with that. Part of the candy came about because of paper craft addictions.   For an explanation of that strange statement, see Cute Chicks, Diving Bunnies and Egg Holders on my craft blog. Perhaps I should find a paper craft that features raw veggies!

A personal revelation has occurred since I've changed my eating habits. I can't eat much junk anymore, even if it looks good, smells good or holds a fond memory. I'm not implying I've tried to disprove that statement by eating a lot of anything, I mean that more than a little and my whole body feels it. Not guilt, I'm talking about the effects of too much fat and sugar. I don't exactly get a stomachache, but I don't feel right. Sort of queasy. Too full. Blech and blah.  Salty foods were never a big draw but cutting way back (almost eliminating) processed foods means my sodium intake is way down. My rings became looser long before the scales would show a significant weight loss. I didn't realize how much sodium I was consuming and despite the extra pounds, I was in denial about the amount of fat and sugar too.  My point is that I feel so much better now and a taste of those things that aren't the best choices are now enough. Twelve Hershey miniatures aren't going to taste any better than one, and they sure aren't going to feel better.

On to shoes...

I wore a dress yesterday which required shoes other than my usual daily choices. I have boots and I have sandals, but here in Michigan yesterday, I needed something in between. My former standby shoes are now a bit sloppy on narrower feet.

Same shoes, three years ago and yesterday on a frame 60+ pounds lighter.

Instead of swelling over the tops of the shoes, there is now a gap and my feet are slipping sideways. 

Oh woe is me.....I have to go shopping.  

Awww, shucks.... 

Last week a friend complimented me on how well I am doing and how good I look. She thought I was at goal or very close to it!  Bless her heart!!!  I am roughly 40 pounds from goal but I may reassess as that approaches. Unlike the past, this time the number will be based on how I feel and if it is a realistic number for me to maintain.

Today's loss was 2.7 for a total of 62.8 pounds.

Onward and downward!